Winning an Oscar is the dream of almost every actor, actress, and precious stage dog—we love you, Uggie!—this side of Hollywood and Vine. What aspiring thespian hasn’t clutched a hairbrush while standing in the mirror, tearfully thanking her agent, parents, and Pilates instructor who knew the name of that discreet plastic surgeon? But what they don’t tell you when you step off the bus from Iowa—because that still happens, right?—is that winning an Academy Award can also be a curse. Or you just have a really bad knack for picking scripts. (We’ll go with cursed.)